Leviticus criticus……


(Jesus (J)is praying alone, watched by an armed JewIsh Jihadi (JJ))

JJ. Jesus of Nazareth, I hope you are praying for yourself!

J. Why, brother?

JJ. Because I’m here to kill you in God’s name, for having given comfort to a Roman, and for having committed abomination.

J. I plead guilty to the comfort, but I need informed about the abomination.

JJ. “If a man lie with another man as with a woman, they have committed abomination.”

J. I know such men, but I’m not one of them. Why do you think I am?

JJ. You pretend to be a Rabbi, but you’re not married, and you teach that men may keep away from women for the sake of God’s kingdom. You live with a group of men, whom you have instructed to love each other.

J. And you, brother, and your fellow soldiers, have you not renounced marriage and family for the sake of holy war? I and my friends are also engaged in holy war, although not against flesh and blood.

JJ. If you swear that this is true, I will spare you.

J. There’s no need for swearing. Yes and no are enough. I’ve said it is so.

JJ. Very well, God be with you….

J. Perhaps we can talk, if you have time for anything but killing…

JJ. Don’t laugh at me, Jesus…

J. What gives you the right to kill in God’s name?

JJ. The right of holy war against the Gentiles who have stolen our land!

J. And the killing of men who lie with men?

JJ. As it is written in the Torah, they shall be killed and their blood shall be on their own heads. Leviticus chapter 20. Surely we must obey the Torah!

J. We have to do something much harder: we have to obey the God of the Torah.

JJ. How can there be a difference?

J. This teaching makes two mistakes. The first is that men lying with men is contrary to God’s creation and therefore abominable. But the truth is that these men were created with this desire; they do not choose it. If you know any, you’ll know that this is the truth. And if God created them, they are also God’s children and precious to him.

JJ. You dare to speak for God against his Torah?

J. Yes. And the second mistake is that God needs our protection, so we must kill those who commit what we call abomination or indeed those who conquer our land. If God needs protected from his creatures, he’s not much of a God.

JJ. How can a true Rabbi show such disrespect for our God?

J. For all your weapons you’re just a child, brother. You need to grow and learn from our father Abraham who was strong enough to argue with God over the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. The Father doesn’t want scared wee kids who hide behind the Torah, but grown up sons and daughters who love him with all their heart and soul and MIND and strength.

JJ. But this is worse blasphemy than lying with men! It mixes the thoughts of human beings with the Word of God!

J. Do you know of any word of God that did not come through the thoughts of human beings?

JJ. But then there will be no certainty in our faith, no absolute authority!

J. The Torah and the prophets are a human witness to God. They are only God’s Word if we treat them as human and sometimes mistaken.

JJ. And you think that’s enough?

J. No of course it’s not enough, child! Once the Torah points us to God, we are to love Him with all our heart and soul  and mind and strength and our neighbour as ourselves. And part of that is going in secret to fall on our knees and pray, as I was doing when you interrupted me.

JJ. Jesus of Nazareth you are a greater danger to God and our people than I could ever have imagined. As a soldier of God I must kill you! God is great!

J. Amen! And because God is great, I’m going to get to my feet and walk past you, and you will not hurt me, because you already think I may be right. If you grow into a new faith, you’ll find me again, and I’ll welcome you. Peace be with you.

(The armed Jihadi stands still as Jesus leaves.)

*jesus and mo, as above, is the most intelligent commentary on contemporary religion available. Just google Jesus and mo.




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