A storm on the Mediterranean. An overcrowded motorboat is wallowing in the waves while another vessel pulls away.
Voice 1: Hey, you can’t leave us here with no petrol……
Voice 2: Come back, there are kids here and a baby, come back, you promised to get us to Greece!!
Voice 3: We paid you well, a thousand a family, and now you ditched us. Bastards!
Voice 1: Well, they’re gone and won’t be back. We better do what we can.
Voice 3: Don’t be a fool! There’s nothing we can do. No gas, no engine, no oars, in the midst of a storm. We’re dead pal.
Voice 2: Don’t say that. We’ve got our kids here. We need to fight for them.
Voice 1: I’ve got an idea! Listen everybody!
Voice 3: Quit wailing would you and listen to the man. Quiet!
Voice 1: If we can’t keep the boat moving the storm will sink us. So, check your belongings for anything , shirts, dresses, coats, we could use as storm sails. And don’t hide anything in your bags. Better to reach land naked than die at sea! So now, look, everybody!
Voice 2: Well done, that’s got them.
Voice 3 : They’re all looking …
Voice 2: Except that man at the back there, he’s doing nothing at all….
Voice 1: It’s almost like he was sleeping…..Good God……or …maybe dead?
Voice 3: Hey at the back there! Yes, there. Check the bloke behind you. He’s not moving…..
Voice 4: Here’s a sheet, will that do?
Voice 5: I’ve got a linen cloak, how about that?
Voice 6: Hey! Up front! This guy is OK he was sleeping, but he’s a troublemaker!
Voice 2: Just ignore him…… Look for sails…..
Voice 1: What sort of trouble?
Voice 6: Says he’s Jesus!
Voice 5: Leave him to me. He’s taking the piss because he knows we’re Christians.
Voice 4: Yeah, that’s what got us into this boat, he’s having a laugh….
Voice 5: Listen you, yeah you at the back, shut your face and look for sails like the rest of us. And no more about being Jesus or we’ll beat the shit outa you….
Jesus: But I am Jesus, I’m sorry I was sleeping while everyone was helping…..
Voice 6: Isn’t there a Bible story………….?
Voice 1: Never mind all that. give me a hand to fix this sheet to the mast to give the boat some movement…
Voice7: Yeah but wait a minute, maybe he is Jesus, and maybe he can save us just like on the Sea of Galilee,
Voice 5: He was sleeping on the boat and his disciples woke him up and he told the wind and the waves to cease and there was a great calm.
Several Voices: Jesus! Lord Jesus! Have mercy upon us. We’re all sinners, except these little children. Have mercy upon them. Speak to the wind and tell the waves to be still. Save us, Lord before we all die!
Jesus: I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do more than you’re doing already.
Voice 6: Don’t give us that stuff. You’re the Son of God, of course you can do anything!
Jesus: That would be nice, but truly I can do no more than you…
Voice 1: Listen! Ignore him.He’s some kind of nutter. Leave him be. Concentrate on keeping calm, looking after the kids and helping me. She’s beginning to pull through the waves.
Voice 3: Yeah, listen to him. He’s more use than Jesus, poor daft bugger…..